I Just Need a Minute...

I remember before I was married and before I had kids when I would hear young moms around me saying the phrase

 "ughhh I just need a minute..just oneee minute."

 

I would laugh sympathetically and think "poor thing."

I did not realize just exactly what the phrase meant.

 

It's been one of those days...no, one of those weeks where

 

Ive just needed a minute.

 

 

A minute where I could drink my coffee in peace without Charlotte reaching and crying for it because she is convinced she needs it.

 

 

A minute where Charlotte's silence means she is playing quietly like a sweet little girl instead of getting into something she isnt supposed to...something that Ive infact told her not to get into a billion times.

 

A minute where I can make dinner or do dishes without Charlotte standing behind me and pulling my pants to the floor because she wants to be held constantly.

 

 

A minute where I can go to the bathroom by myself without my little baby needing to sit on my lap at the same time because...again she wants to be held constantly.

 

A minute where I can bathe by myself.

 

A minute where she doesnt run away from me while Im trying to dress her to go poop and pee on my floor.

 

 A minute where she isnt throwing away our car keys, ID cards, wallets, or wiping her boogies on our white couch (hey its clear we are first time parents because what mom buys a white couch??)

 

A minute where I am not cleaning because as soon as I finish cleaning one room, Charlotte goes in after me and destroys it.

 

 

 

 

 

Then I get one of those minutes.

 

 



 

When Zach and I are at a church event and Charlotte

is in childcare and after 30 minutes Im missing her terribly.

Then I go to pick her up and seeing how excited she gets and yells "dada" while she runs to me (she used to know I am mama) is the best moment in my day

 

Or when I put her to bed 15 minutes early because neither her or I can take one more minute...

and thirty minutes goes by and I start saying things to Zach like

 

"Did you see how she ran off and peed on the floor? She is so stinking cute."

 

or

 

"I cant believe she threw away our keys! That was hilarious."

 

Then I get one of those minutes and I dont seem to remember how stressed, frustrated, and exhausted I was for most of the day.

All I remember is how funny and cute my little girl is or all the things that werent so cute during the day all of the sudden seem adorable.

All I remember is the love, joy, and fullness she brings to my life.

 

 

Then I sit in awe and think that about how through Charlotte, God has given me a glimpse of His love for me.

 

 

I cant do anything for Him.

Im completely helpless.

I get into things Im not supposed to.

I follow Him around, whining and crying.

I do things He tells me not to

because it's my life and He surely just doesnt understand that I know better.

I make a mess of my life.

I break His heart...

 

and at the end of the day when I go to Him and tell Him I'm sorry

 

He tells me it's already forgiven.

He has already forgotten

and all He remembers is the love, joy, and fullness of heart I bring Him.

 

 

It's a beautiful picture.